Are you living life, or is life living you? What I mean is this: are you an active participant or a passive bystander? When you look back on the life you've been given, the time you've had, will you say you spent each moment intentionally, or did your seconds silently turn into years and before you knew it, life was gone?
Kierkegaard wrote about a coin he received as change that had been passed around so many times the face had been worn off. He looked at this and realized the risk people take when they seek to be accepted rather than seeking to be their authentic self.
Finding yourself, defining yourself, is not terribly difficult. When it becomes truly difficult is after you've found or rediscovered yourself. At that point you have something to lose, you have a reason to be held accountable, and you risk being hurt. But anything less is to ensure you will never truly be in relationship, you will never truly live your life, and your happiness will be a fleeting emotion dependent upon others and external factors.